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Welcome to The Mum Club, we are Jess and Lauren thanks for stopping by. Please let us know if we can help you with anything... 

Why having kids is f***ing great!

Why having kids is f***ing great!

We air on the side of negative on here. This is probably down to the fact that we are 1, British.. and 2, talking about how great things are isn't that funny and does nothing for those that are having quite a shit day!! But despite what it may seem, we both really love being a mum and here are some reasons why:

1, LOVE

Yup, we started there. No-one will ever quite love you as much as your sprog loves you. Even when they are having an absolute MELTDOWN, shouting that they hate you at they top of their lungs in Aldi, and declaring war. They love you, and you really really love them, like a love that cannot be explained. 

2, AIRPORT QUICK TRACKS

Similar to love really.. no queuing.... 

3, PERSPECITIVE.

Nothing quite says perspective then having a being to grow. A tiny thing that depends on you for everything really sets the pace of life and what is important. Life becomes less about giving a shit and more about clearing it up..

4, HUNGOVER CUDDLES

Alcohol doesn't hug you in the morning, babies do. 

5, MAT LEAVE

Ok so its way too short and not everyone gets it BUT if you do, its paid time at home to figure the mine field out and quality time with your babe (and the odd mates you met at NCT!) 

6, EMPOWERMENT 

You made a baby, mate you can basically take over the world.

7, BODY APPRECIATION

Pre baby you had hang ups, now that you've swollen to the size of a warthog and back down you really do start to love it . Course we all want to get back to that pre baby bod. But its ok if its a little saggier here and there. IT MADE A HUMAN, WT ACTUAL F, It can have a dominos or two as kudos.  

8, SOMEONE YOU CAN TELL YOUR HUSBAND OFF THROUGH

'Wouldn't mummy be happy if someone took out the bins'

9, PARKING

Hello wide load bays, I'm going to park my mum bus here and open every door BECAUSE I CAN. This works until they are 18 right?

10, THE BEST EXCUSE EVER

When you just can't be arsed, you have the perfect excuse to cancel on any plans. Blame the baby, no-one can say shit to it. 

11, MOTHERS DAY

Any extra gift day is a good day we say!

12, PATIENCE

Nothing teaches you patiences like a kid on a scooter. That they made you take to the park just so you could carry around. Life must slow down, it is an art to reinforce but once you've figured it out its enlightening. 

13, DISNEY

Thats right, you get to relive your childhood dreams and ballad out to disney in the car pretending its for them. A WHOLE NEW WORLDDDDD...

14, ALCOHOL

There will never be a more solid reason to have a glass of wine at 5pm (read 11am)

15, ANIMAL NOISES

The day your child quacks for the first time your heart will burst into a million pieces.

16, A BUDDY FOR LIFE.

There will be days when you question your friendship, but even on those days they will be your best friend for life and we head right back to reason one...

Oh and 17, BIGGER TITS.

Yours, not theirs.. weird. 

 

Sh*t no one tells you about pregnancy & birth

Sh*t no one tells you about pregnancy & birth