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Welcome to The Mum Club, we are Jess and Lauren thanks for stopping by. Please let us know if we can help you with anything... 

Tits are amazing.

Tits are amazing.

When I first drafted this article early this morning in bed on my phone Notes autocorrected 'Tits' to 'Toys'. Which I of course laughed at. The irony is this is exactly how I saw my breasts right up until I fell pregnant.  Nothing much more than fun bags, toys for my husband to play with. Re- reading this it maybe sounds a little degrading, but its an honest account. What use did I have for them other than to be a sexual desire to attract the opposite sex. I didn't need them for anything. They were a show piece with no real worth. Of course I was aware that in the future I may need them for breastfeeding. But that is the extent to where I got on that thought. I had never quite grasped the magnitude of how f***ing amazing tits really are. *For the sake of newborns everywhere I will now stop calling them tits*.

Nothing can quite prepare you for the importance of the role your breasts are now about to play. Before anything, for me they were my first detection of pregnancy. Their presence became overwhelming and as the days go by and my body continues to change to make room for our kid, my breasts too are in preparation state. Did you know for example that babies are born extremely near sighted, which means they can see things about 8 to 15 inches away which also happens to be the distance between your face and the babies face when breastfeeding. Did you also know that this is the reason for your nipples darkening and enlarging. So your new born baby can see where to go to feed. Bonkers. 

*I must point out at this point that although I hate to sit on the fence and believe opinion is the spice of life, this article is not a judgement on breastfeeding. We here at The Mum Club could not give a monkeys on whether you breast or bottle feed your babies. We are merely congratulating nature and its insane ability to throw duces up to years of tit (sorry) banter*

Did you also know that whilst breastfeeding your body produces the type of milk your baby requires at the time it needs it. Even before your milk comes in, in the first few days after birth, your breasts make a thick, sticky, yellowish fluid sometimes referred to as “liquid gold.” Called colostrum it has all the minerals and antibodies your baby needs. Your baby needs only a few teaspoons to feel full and stay healthy until your milk flow increases, about two to five days after birth.

If you're already a mum you'll have read this shit thousands of times and be so sick of breastfeeding chat you'll be cursing this blog. But as a newly pregnant women I am in ore of how amazing the human body is. Ok so not every day is pleasant. They hurt like f*** some days, I can't sleep on my front, not for my bump just yet but for these shopping bags (no longer such 'fun') Clothes are a bigger issue. High necked anything is a no no. They look like they are growing out of my neck. Oh and don't even get me started on sex. Your once objects of desire are now very much udders. I am almost certain that many women post pregnancy look down at their deflated bags of sick ( a terrible terrible term, I'm sorry) and cry at what they once had. 

But ladies it is time to celebrate how fucking brilliant our breasts are. So important, so needed so vulnerable. How they put up with being called 'Honkers' 'Melons' and jugs' is a hats off to their strength.

LW

Trigger word

Trigger word

It's not you... it's me

It's not you... it's me